- You can ask a guy out without sounding desperate through phone calls, texts, inviting him for a hangout, using body language, complimenting him, and being casual
- Some men find women that ask them out and make the first move to be attractive
- You can make incomplete statements and let the guy lead you to complete it or ask questions regarding what he thinks about going out with you
How do I ask a guy out without sounding desperate? Asking a man out in a number of societies is already desperate enough. On the other hand, a Cosmopolitan review based on a study shows that about 91 percent of men don’t have a problem with a woman asking them out and about 56% of women have asked men out. As such, asking a man to go out with you may not be the problem but sounding desperate may be the vital issue.
You can ask a man out without sounding desperate with text, phone call, invite them for a drink, lunch, or dinner, or use several body languages to ask him out or get him to ask you out.
An important thing to have in mind before asking a guy out is that there are chances that things may not turn out positive.
How Can I Ask a Man Out Through Text or Phone Call?
Text is one of the easiest ways to ask a guy out since it is viewed as one of the easiest and most comfortable ways to send a message. It also gives a better time to think, hence helping you to choose words carefully.
The text could be Rich Communication Services (RCS), SMS & MMS, In-App messaging, or via social media. Whatever the type of text that one chooses, the choice of words is very important.
Some ways to ask a guy out via text
- Ask after his job or how his day is (was)
- Ask if you’ll be free for a lunch or to hangout
- If you’re going out with friends, text him to join you
While at it, it is important to note that no matter how casual you may want to be in your text, you may seem desperate if you follow it up with another text asking for a reply.
If you’re not a person that is into text messages, a phone call could be of help. One of the advantages of phone calls over text is that you get to have a clue whether the man wants you or not from the tone of his voice.
A phone call also shields you from looking at the man’s face which can cause uneasiness to a number of women.
On how to not sound desperate, you may want to avoid begging the man to go out with you or being too direct. Instead, be as casual as possible and ask about things that are not too personal. If at all you want to ask about personal things, ask about his girlfriend. It may send him a signal that you want him around.
For Instance: Ask how his day is going or how it went, give him a snippet of your day; invite him for a drink, and ask about some of his interests if you have no prior knowledge.
Are There Body Languages to Use to Ask a Man Out?
According to research, 55% of how the message of attraction goes is through body language. Hence, this would be one of the easiest ways to get a man to go out with you. The one thing that remains vital nonetheless is how you don’t seem desperate.
The body language may not necessarily be asking a man out but it is a way to show that you want him without necessarily having to articulate it. Also, it could be a good step to make the man ask you out instead. It could also be a first step to asking a guy out.
Wondering the body language to use? The eye often called the window to the soul is a good tool to use in body language. A fixed gaze directed at a man’s eye is a form of showing interest without being desperate. This does not only signal a man that you want him, but it may as well be another form of asking him out. In addition, it could be the first step to prepare his mind in case you want to use words to ask him out.
Other body languages to use to speak to a man before asking him out include:
- Smiles
- Glances
- Playing with the lips or hair
- Face the man while speaking
- A light touch
- Showing a little shyness around the man
How Do I Ask a Guy Out in Person?
Looking at a man and asking him out could be more intimidating than methods like text. However, it may also portray you to the man as a woman who is not afraid to go for what she wants. Regardless, there could be a twist in this method if you end up sounding desperate.
Before you decide to ask a man out verbally and when around him, you may want to explore some body language – or not! In any case, here are some ways to tell a man that you want to go out with him without sounding desperate.
- Make incomplete statements. Eg. “I really find you… never mind”
The above will make him curious to want to know what you have in mind. So instead of sounding desperate, he may end up giving a little push to hear what you have to say. If there’s a push from him, complete the statement. For instance, I really find you attractive.
- Ask him what he thinks about going out with you. Eg. What do you think about going out with me?
- Tell him how you enjoy spending time with him and if he’d like to do it again
- Make positive remarks about his looks or other things you find attractive
- Tell him you like him. You may want to avoid using the word love.
See Also: What Are The Ways to Make a Man Feel Loved and respected?
Find Ways to Get Help From Him, Read Him, and Be Flirty
There is a popular opinion that men find it attractive when a woman calls them out for help. Inasmuch as the woman may want to spend time with the man she fancies, it could also be an avenue to show that you are interested in a man.
While you may have gotten his attention through the act of service from him, you may want to pay attention to his body language. Some signs to look for before asking a man to go out with you is checking if he gives you the same vibe as you do him.
In addition, you may want to have a clue if he is in another relationship or not. Also, check out how comfortable he is around you and how he treats you as compared to other people around him.
Based on a number of publications drawn from research, men do not find it unattractive that a woman flirts with them. To a high number of them, it is not desperation but a thing that only women with confidence can do.
In conclusion, many sources have suggested that a woman should create a form of friendship (not necessarily close) with a man before asking him out. Nonetheless, this does not guarantee that he may feel the same about you. A negative response from him does not mean he thinks you’re desperate but he probably is taken or has his reservations.
